Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Civil Disobedience

This is one of the instances in which I feel I fail at being a parent: when my children deliberate defy me to test my limits.

I have never been the best disciplinarian. I wouldn't go as far to say I spoiled them, but I am definitely guilty of the "not following through." I fear I have the title of "queen of idle threats" when it comes to their perspective. I also yell when I lose my temper. *sigh*

This morning was a winner. Two out of three really pushed me. Biggest one wanted to stay home again today, but had no fever, just a sore throat. He whined but acquiesced with not much argument.

Darling daughter, who is a red head through and through, decided to ignore my requests to brush her teeth and comb her hair before school, up to the point where I asked her if she was choosing not to do it and deliberately defying me. She said yes.

I did stay calm, for which I was proud of. Unfortunately in the middle of all this I saw littlest one most carefully combing his hair---still in pj's, with the bus due in 5 minutes. He then threw a fit with me, saying he wasn't going to school and refusing to get dressed. This is where I usually pick him up and force the clothes on him, but today I pulled out the "ok, mommy will drive you to school" card and told him to put his clothes on. By that point, daughter had her hat and coat on. I told her this wasn't over and we would discuss it when she got home.

She gets home in ten minutes and I still don't know what to do. I am so screwed when she hits puberty.

13 comments:

Bee said...

My mom would chase us with her slipper when we disobeyed. She never hit us, but omg were we scared of that slipper. Its all about the fear.

And I don't know what my parents did to us growing up, but with one stern look we would behave. If we knew we did something bad, and we knew they knew, one look from them would have us balling and apologizing. I kid you not. Damn good parenting!!

Dave Amirault said...

time for some good ol' street justice.

Jamie: said...

me too. I could get a LOOK and know I was doomed. Heee!

Jobee said...

The method most used at book club is to take away the kid's favorite thing at that time. You have to hit low and hard and that seems to make them remember that there is a direct relationship between their behavior and the punishment. When Miss M can't have her princess dress for a night, the message hits home. However, without the follow-through, you are just a joke. Get tough mommy!!!!

Joe said...

I remember those days. Everyone told me the kids were just "learning to be independent" but it made it no less frustrating.

Erm...it got much, much worse when they hit their teens.

krysten said...

omg, bee, i just laughed so hard at the mental picture of a mom chasing her children with a slipper that my two year old dropped his spoonful of oatmeal and shot me a look of horror and confusion!

that is awesome. i need to add slippers to my target list...

ps - my mom just used the back of her hand. pretty effective i might add.

Jamie: said...

My mom used a wooden spoon.

Anonymous said...

Ihave alot to post, but I need to just say one thing...

"I'm not happy"


and a bottle of grated cheese in the head really hurts.

Giovanna said...

I am laughing so hard right now you have no idea.

And you get an automatic "F" from Sr. Mary Ellen

Anonymous said...

is F You gramatically correct?

MyUtopia said...

My mother grabbed pony tails.... which is why I liked my hair short :)

Jobee said...

G you looser -
Sr. Mary Hope gave automatic F errors - Mary Ellen was the eldest sister on The Waltons.

Giovanna said...

See how much I love you that I provide such fodder for you to mock me.

I can't wait to come down to NYC for that day I'm not allowed to say when it is. I want to go out and karaoke with you, mikey, and like the whole looser crew because it will be a riot.