Wednesday, August 24, 2005

With knots I've got yet to untie

I feel so good right now, I can't even begin to describe it. But I'm going to try anyway because what's the point of having a blog then? LOL

You see, I began the day a little down. I've been thinking a lot lately about that "inner voice" - the one we are supposed to be listening to. Whether you want to think of it as your soul, or "Self" or even your conscience, it should be a guiding force. I think mine's been a little obfuscated - either conscious or unconsciously, by too many other voices: The voices of my parents, voices of other mothers, the voice of a spouse... or the voice of a mentor that was more than likely a little too ardent with overblown praise for my writing. That combined with the propensity for self-doubt made me wonder why the hell I was writing? Who was I writing for? Me? Or someone else? Was I doing it because my inner voice wanted to write, or because I was so flattered by the stroking of my ego?

Tonight I was dreading my last workshop because I had turned in this emotional piece that in retrospect thought was a stupid piece of crap. (emotional gastritis!) Much to my surprise I received a lot of positive feedback on it. The obvious flaws, the stuff I knew the story was lacking were certainly pointed out and focused on, but I had so many compliments on my prose, scenes, dialog... more importantly, without even knowing me, without even a word from me, without any prompting whatsoever, these people said that the internal struggle of my protagonist would make a compelling story. That once I expand and flesh out the characters and give more information, that it would be great.

I have pages and pages of scenes and dialog and ideas that fall into these lines. I feel so energized to know I can make it work.

I believe in myself. I can write. And I am writing for me.

2 comments:

Giovanna said...

Ok, I told Brain Diva that once the movie rights are optioned for my book I want QT to direct. LOL She said she would. Laura Dern could play the main character, (she feels Drew Barrymore would not do it justice) She thinks Harrison Ford should play the love interest. I was going for Richard Gere... ;)

Brain Diva said...

Oh, I love playing fictional casting! LOL You can get QT to direct; I was just suggesting it'd be much cheaper if I did it. ;) I love Drew Barrymore but she misses an edge for the main character you describe. Laura Dern is good. My pick is Lauren Graham though. She does witty and strong She would rock. Richard Gere does work as the older man but Harrison is more charismatic, IMO.

Giovanna suggested Tina Fey as the sassy best friend (I would like to think it is based on me. LOL). I concur. I also suggested Sara Rue from the sitcom "Less Than Perfect". I haven't watched that show very often (not very interesting) but her timing and delivery are flawless.

The husband still remains to be cast. I suggested Ewan McGregor just because he brings on the pretty but it might indeed be difficult to see why she would forsake Ewan. LOL How about John Cusack? He can play the underdog very well. I'm also thinking Mark Ruffalo...